A day that changed my entire life. It was this very day three years ago that I first held my most precious son in my arms. In that moment, I witnessed the promise of the Lord fulfilled in the life of our family. God had asked us to trust Him in the biggest of ways. And when I reached the top of those stairs and saw my son mere feet from me, I knew that the Lord had asked something big of us so that He could give us something bigger in return.
I held that eleven month old child, still a stranger to him, and prayed that the Lord would bind our hearts together. That He would somehow make my son know, in the depths of his soul, that he is fiercely and deeply loved. I begged God to move.
And three years later, I look at my my son, my nearly four year old boy, and I see the bravest soul I have ever known. I see someone the Lord loves so fully. I see a child whom I could not possibly love any more. He is the light of my life, a CONSTANT reminder of God's faithfulness.
And here we are. On the cusp of doing it again. Begging God to move AGAIN. Pleading with Him to give our daughter a supernatural peace during these last days. Days that she does not know are the last of their kind for her. I am praying, throwing myself at God's feet, asking Him to ready her heart for us.
I remember this feeling so clearly when it was Bradley. My heart: bursting with love for this longed-for child. All the while knowing that he had no clue that we even existed. I find myself in that same place tonight. Loving our daughter deeply and knowing that, when she meets us in a few short days, we will be strangers to her.
Adoption is so many things. Not the least of which is utterly heartbreaking.
So will you pray for her tonight? Will you join me in pleading with God for her heart and soul? I am praying that the Lord would, somehow, let her know that we love her and that she is safe with us. I am praying that she sees us as permanent figures and not just another set of rotating caregivers who will be here for awhile and then gone forever.
I know it can be done. I have seen it in the life of my son. And I am begging the Lord to do the same for my daughter.
With love,
Baylor
No comments:
Post a Comment