Monday, November 4, 2013

A Hard Choice with a Beautiful Outcome

I feel like a lot of my posts here fall into the Debbie Downer category. What can I say? Feeling sad makes me want to write. I guess it is just how I process things. Today is not going to be one of those days. It might start out sounding like that, but stick with me to the end. I promise it is worth it!

Each month, when our agency sends out our monthly wait list number update, they include a list of waiting children. These are children who are ready or nearly ready to be adopted, but do not meet the requirements of anyone on the waiting list. Talk about breaking your heart. Most of these children are on the list because they are older. In a lot of cases, they are too old for us to adopt. Most countries have an "18 year rule" which stipulates that adoptive parents must be 18 years older than the child they wish to adopt. So pretty mush all of these children have not been an option for us.

Well, when we got our saddest update yet at the beginning of October (the one telling us we were at #31 for another month), there was a new child on the waiting list. A one year old boy. The first child on the waiting list who was within our approved age range. My heart started sputtering.

I called Adam right away and told him I felt like we should email Lesley, our program director, and tell her we wanted some more information about this little one so that we could pray and see if this is what the Lord had for us. She sent us some more information on his right away.

We spent the next several days praying and asking God if this was our son. We felt like the Lord was closing this door. But so many things about the situation seemed so perfect. I asked, begged, implored.

"God, are you sure? This seems so right."

But we never felt like we got the green light. It was heartbreaking.

I knew we had to call Lesley back and tell her that we felt like this precious boy was not our son. I couldn't even bring myself to make the call. Adam had to do it.

We knew this boy was not our son, but we committed to pray for him and for his family. We prayed that he would be adopted quickly. And by a loving family who would welcome him home with loving arms and open hearts.

I told Adam that if this little one was still waiting when we got matched, then we would be revisiting this conversation and might very well be bringing home two littles.

We were praying for this little fellow by name and asking God to bring him a family soon.

Well, not two days later....

My friend Noelle sent me a message. She and her husband are one spot ahead of us on the waiting list. Our paperwork arrived in Ethiopia on the same day, and we have been friends ever since.

Guess what her message said...

She and Colin are adopting that very same little boy!

How insane is that? The very boy we were praying for has been adopted by my friend!

Oh, God is good. So, so good.

Noelle is going to be an incredible mom, and I hope to one day be able to meet their precious son.

Back to Noelle's message. I wrote her back right away and told her that we had inquired about this boy, felt like the Lord was saying no and started praying right away that the Lord would match him with his family quickly. I just couldn't believe it. God answered in 48 hours. And He answered in a big way!

But God did not stop there.

Noelle wrote me back right away, and there is a part of her message that I will never, ever forget.

Thank you so much for following the Lord, too. Thank you for being willing to say no, when I'm sure it would have been so tempting to say Yes. Thank you for allowing us the chance to be **little one's name** parents. And I know that when you receive your referral, it will be for the little boy(s) or girl(s) that are meant for you!

God works in the craziest of ways. He used us being led to say no to a child to lift up my heart and reassure me that He is ultimately and completely in control of all of this. How incredible is that?

Thank you, Noelle, for speaking some seriously needed encouragement into my life. I cannot wait to meet your little one. I know he will bless your life beyond measure!


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