Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Waiting List Number : May 2013

I cannot believe that it is already May 1st! That means summer is near! And in this house, it also means that it is time for our monthly wait list update. I have to preface this post by saying that April was an incredibly difficult month. And by that I mean that the adoption world fell silent for us. We hear NOTHING about any referrals for the entire month. Until yesterday, when we heard about one. So I had been gearing myself up for this to be the month we did not move at all. I had been praying that God would prepare my heart, that I would not rebel against Him as a result of my circumstances. But, as He always does, He showed up in a way I did not expect. He did more than I thought possible.

So, here it goes...

Good bye 60s!! We are #57!
Daisy is relieved! 
I don't think she could have handled another month in the 60s! 

I know that three spots might not seem earth-shattering, but you have to remember that I was expecting to be at #60 for another month. So, to me, 57 is a HUGE blessing.

Every single step of this adoption path is stretching me, testing my faith, refining me. And it is not always pleasant; in fact, it is usually quite unpleasant. But I am starting to see so much good come out of this. God is revealing parts of Himself to me, and as I learn more about Him, I come to love and trust Him more; I am able to worship Him more fully. Trials and difficulties, I think, can result in one of two things.

1. We can shut down and miss what God has for us. I think sometimes this seems like the better option because it feel easier at the time. In reality, this is never the right choice, because we end up missing out on what God has for us.

2. We can turn to God and trust in His goodness. This one almost always seems like the harder choice. Probably because it involves taking a step (or a dozen steps) in faith. We are trusting a God we can't see sitting in front of us. But when we choose this option, God shows us His character, and we end up knowing Him better and becoming more like Christ.

I recently came across a Rick Warren quote on Pinterest. I have actually never read his book, The Purpose Driven Life, but what he said here really resonated with me. Here it is:

"Your most profound and intimate experiences of worship will likely be in your darkest days--when your heart is broken, when you feel abandoned, when you're out of options, when the pain is great--and you turn to God alone."

Ummmm. Amen.

This month was a dark time for me. But I feel like I am growing and knowing the Lord more as a result. And as my husband reminded me last night, if we come out of this knowing God more, being able to minister to other's in His name more, being able to point people to Him more, then all of this is worth it.

Thank you for praying alongside us. We love, appreciate and need you! Please keep praying for us; we are hoping that the month of May will bring the gush of referrals we have been waiting for!

"As for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more and more."
Psalm 71:14


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