Boo for being able to write this post.
Today marks 18 months since have started the adoption journey.
Wow. (Or as my mom would say, "Wowie kazowie!)
This is another day I never really thought would get here. When started this whole process, the wait time from application to placement (baby in your house) was 12-15 months. Sitting at 18 months with no end in sight is not exactly what we thought would happen.
But here we are.
And we are here because this is right where the Lord has us. I know that.
It seems providential to me that this day comes right as I am preparing to go to Chicago to run in my first marathon. Training for this race has been a mirrored reflection of what we are living while waiting to bring our children home. It has been so difficult and demanded so much of me in every way possible. Just like this adoption journey. Twenty six miles is way farther than I ever thought I would go. So to is eighteen months.
But God has been working in my life through both of these challenges. He has been growing my faith and trust in Him. He has shown me, time and again, that when things get hard and I feel like giving up, I need to press in instead and lean on Him to bring me through. So I am beyond thankful that the Lord orchestrated for me to be running this very literal race while simultaneous running this spiritual race.
Still, it is hard to be here. Eighteen months is a long time.
There are certainly days when I feel like giving up. I am so tired of waiting. Exhausted really. Sometimes, I look around and I kind of can't believe this is my life. I know it is what God has called us to, and for that reason alone it is an honor. But I am ready for my children to come home. Ready to have a little one sleeping against my chest while I write to you. Ready to have to put off writing till another day because my children need me.
But I know that the Lord knows who our children are. And I will wait for them as long as He asks me to. I hope it isn't too much longer. I am ready to know their faces and their hearts.
Please, Lord God, let this be the last year that we do not know who our children are.
"Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord."